Monday, December 19, 2016

10 of the Worst Christmas Songs Known to Mankind

MUSIC
While Christmas should be the most wonderful time of the year, the season can be ruined in an instant when "that" song comes on the air. You know what I'm talking about. Everyone has at least one version of a Christmas song that they can't stand. Here is my unofficial list for 2016. Feel free to chime in.

"Carol of the Bells" by Destiny's Child
Carol of the Bells is probably my favorite Christmas song and I have enjoyed many different versions of it over the years from the traditional choir to powerful version by the Trans-Siberian Orchestra, but this is just a mess. There is no question that Destiny's Child are talented and it seems that they were clearly going for something that has never been done before. They achieved it, but it won't ever be done again.




"Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" by William Hung
Poor William Hung. You remember him, don't you? He was a contestant on American Idol and was infamous for his version of "She Bangs." The fact that he can't sing is like a joke that everyone understands except for himself.





"Christmas in the Northwest" by Brenda Kutz WhiteI might get in trouble for this one. If you don't live in Washington or Oregon, chances are you've never been subjected to this rousing tune singing the virtues of living in the Northwest where rain is a much more common sight on Christmas morning than snow. People love this song but I don't know why. Brenda Kutz Whilte has a very nice voice, but the extra-long song is schmaltzy at best. This music video produced by KOMO TV doesn't do it any favors either. Sure, an "A" for effort but...



"Silver Bells" from Disco Noel
I actually owned this album and it is just like it sound: classic Christmas song set to a disco beat - some sounding better than others. It was one of a cheap album that I found at a small drug store. Since it was the '80s, it sounded right for the time and I (shamefully) actually enjoyed it. Except for this song. This song always sounded weird.



"The Christmas Song" by David HasslehoffLike many other Americans, I'm stunned how popular "The Hoff" is in other countries. He can sing, but his voice is nothing special. Here is "The Christmas Song" featured on a Christmas special in 2010. Is it just me, or does he seem a little creepy in the video?



"Christmas Shoes" by NewSong
This song is divisive among Christians. Either you love it or you hate it. If you side with the latter, listening to the nearly five minute long song can be grueling. Enjoy!



"Little Drummer Boy" by Justin Bieber and Busta Rhymes
Justin Bieber has done a lot of stupid stuff in his short life so far, but this stunt might land in the top 5. I'm all for singers coming up with unique twists to classic Christmas tunes, in fact, I prefer it. But this is just depressing.



"The Bell That Couldn't Jingle" by Burt Bacharach and Herb Alpert
Chances are you've never heard this song and you've been blessed. Oh, it's a little catchy tune, but it will get stuck in your brain and never let go. But what's worse is the lyrics. Come on, Santa is a busy man and doesn't have time to talk to deformed Christmas bells. So glad that Rankin Bass never came up with a holiday special based on this song.



"O Holy Night" by the Brady BunchYes Virginia, there IS a Christmas album by the Fab Six and if you never heard it, you're in for a treat. Okay, not really. Just because these can act, doesn't mean that they can sing. For this song, the first half is sung by Marcia Brady herself (Maureen McCormick) and finished off by Greg (Barry Williams) who is probably a better singer today than he was back then.



"Happy Birthday Jesus" by Brooklyn Tabernacle ChoirI'm swimming in dangerous territory with this one as well (and as long as my mother doesn't know that I've added it to the list, I should be okay) as it is considered a "classic" by many. Sure, the little girl singing the lead is cute, but that doesn't make it a good song and I don't have to like it.